Evolution

The popular belief is that we are all made in the image of a divine artist. It seems to be a simple way for artists to explain why they are so great as well as removing themselves from the natural world. This couldn't be further from the truth. Evolution is more than just a theory, its an actuality and we are all the product of it. Evolution begins upon going to an undergraduate art school. Here the artist learns crucial skills and behaviors under the guidance of highly-evolved artists. As the artist builds his or her skills, he or she either evolves or drops out of art school and dies, which prevents the under-evolved artist from reproducing and passing along his or her genes. The evolution culminates into a thesis exhibition, and while it's unremarkable, it's important to realize that the artist is still young and evolving. The next phase is applying to an art graduate program. After applying, there is a period of, "Natural Selection," where artists are either accepted and continue their evolution or a rejection where the artist dies off and fails to pass along the genes of a successful artist to his or her offspring. Once the artist begins his or her graduate work, he or she is put into a, "Survival of the Fittest" scenario where a series of critiques determines which artists are more highly evolved than their peers. The more highly adapted artists continue to evolve in their work and skills whereas the artists who have not sufficiently evolved are removed from the program and die out. The next phase of evolution is a graduate thesis exhibition. Leading up to this point artists continue to evolve, trying to utilize new skills and behaviors, while still engaging in the struggle of surviving. At this point, many artists die out, leaving only the most adapted artists behind. The thesis exhibition is a cataclysmic event similar to the meteorite that killed off the dinosaurs. Only 1% of the most highly evolved artists will survive afterwards, whereas the rest either die off or get a series of low-paying and unrelated jobs, both of which prevent the under-evolved artists from passing on their inferior genes to their offspring.